chris vs. the arctic

chris: 72 // the arctic: 47

Classroom Innuendoes

Most of the children I teach at Daimon junior high school are tame. They are like other students in the world; they get bored, amused, excited, sleepy, etc. One class, however, is out of control. When I walk into the 1-4 (Grade 7, Class 4) room, the class erupts into a chorus of praise and applause. (I'm not even exaggerating here.) "Oh Chris! Handsome! Cool cool! Kawaii (cute)!" Today, I got "Bonjour! Ni hao! Bonjorno!" Random. I love them.

Today's lesson riled them up. I have to teach from an English textbook called "Sunshine." It's slightly embarrassing, but it does hold some gems. For instance, today's program:

Cowboy: "Yuki, this is for you."
Yuki: "Wow, it's big. Thanks. How do I eat it?"
Andy: "Just take a bite."
Yuki: "Everything is big here. Big houses, big yards, big hats, ... and big sandwiches!"
Cowboy: "Yeah." [Read as, "yeeeeeah."]

Just picture 40 enthusiastic 13 year-olds reading this text out loud! They think the "yeah" part is hilarious, but they have no idea what's going through my sick mind...

Actually, they apparently do have an idea. After class, a couple of boys ran out of the room and caught me in the hallway. They asked me the usual questions to get a sticker. "Do you like fruit?" "Are you from Japan?" All typical, except for their extra-curricular application of a new phrase...

They pointed to my crotch, then grabbed their own, and said, "it's big! It's big!" Thanks guys. To top it off, one of them came up to me, brushed the hair off my forehead, and said, "Chris. Beckham. Handsome. Chris is handsome." Where did they even learn that word?? Hilarious!
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On November 21, 2005, Blogger Gillian said:

Ha-n-so-mu : It's Japanese, doncha know, eh? Like Bai-bai, which they also claim is all their own... ummm, no. Eigo desu, yo!    



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